Describe your dream wedding
by JenT
Summary: Harm sends Mac an email. Things progress from there. Please read and review. Complete!


"Describe your dream wedding"  
PG-13  
Harm/Mac  
  
Author's notes: About a week ago on the shipper list we were talking about those 'getting to know you' emails. One of the questions is 'describe your dream wedding'. Well, several people filled them out for the JAG characters, and this story sprang from that idea.  
  
Spoilers: Up until The Mission, takes place sometime in season seven.  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine!  
  
Feedback: jugrox91@yahoo.com  
  
  
  
  
Mac stared at the computer screen in shock. What had started out as simple child's game had quickly turned deep. She didn't know why she allowed it to affect her. They had flirted back and forth for years. This 'dance' as she once called it, had changed tempo and they had found themselves on familiar and comfortable ground once again.  
  
She glanced through her door toward the copy machine. Harm and Sturgis were beside it deep in conversation. Harm looked up at her and flashed that smile that could make her weak in the knees or break her heart depending on the context. Had he meant it? Not just the answer but everything that went with it. Sturgis looked her way and then the two men shared a good, hearty laugh.  
  
A flash of anger went through her then. Had Sturgis betrayed her confidence? Had he told Harm what she blurted out to him in her office? No, she reminded herself. Commander Turner may have rubbed her the wrong way at first, but he was honest and trustworthy and turning into a good friend. She suspected his father had helped shape his belief system and code of honor in a way her father had not with her. He was a good man who wouldn't betray her trust.  
  
That left one alternative. Was Harm finally able to let go? And how was she supposed to find out without putting her heart on the line again? She had finally come to terms with her feelings for her handsome partner. It was liberating that day with Sturgis when she had said aloud that she was in love with Harm. However, just because she had dealt with it didn't mean Harm had.  
  
The way she saw it, she had two options. She could march into Harm's office with a hard copy of the email and demand an explanation face to face. Or she could reply to the correspondence, effectively giving him the coward's way out if he needed it. And he probably did.  
  
The Marine in her wanted to use the former battle plan. They should have it out face to face. And he would probably end up handing her heart to her on a silver platter. The same way he had in Sydney Harbor, on the Guadalcanal and so many other times in the past. The woman in her couldn't deal, wouldn't deal with that rejection again.  
  
She knew Harm loved her. He had admitted it in his own way on the Admiral's porch. He had showed it to her in so many ways over the years. The way he protected her from danger, protected her from herself. The way he was always there when she needed a friend, well almost always. He just didn't know how, or didn't want to, deal with it. For a man who thrived on action, rushed headlong into danger, he seemed to have the most difficulty with women.  
  
Or at least her.  
  
Frustrated, she threw her pen across her desk and put her head in her hands. She had more important things to do than obsess over Harm and their relationship, or lack thereof. She had a case coming up for appeal, a case going to trial soon and Chloe was coming down in a few weeks.  
  
Sometimes she wished she had her attention span. When she first met Harm, he was all she talked about. Her eleven year old mind was convinced they were in love and would live happily ever after. She had even taken after Harm in her inexplicable hatred for Mic Crumby. But a few years later, Mic had managed to win her over to the point that she blamed Harm when she didn't marry Mic. Now, however, a ride in Harm's new corvette, alone, had won her back to Harm's corner. After they had gotten back that night, Mac had commented to Harm that it was a good thing she knew him so well or she would be concerned about how he got back into her good graces so quickly. It had taken a few minutes for her implication to set in but once it had, he shot back.  
  
"Ewww!!! Mac, she's not even fifteen. They'd castrate me for something like that."  
  
Of course, Mac had quickly found out the real reason the next morning.  
  
"Harm is so cool," Chloe exclaimed over breakfast. "He let me drive!"  
  
But none of that solved her current problem. She wasn't fourteen. Life couldn't be solved by who was hot, or who let you drive. It was decided by people who weren't afraid of risks.  
  
A long ago conversation entered her mind and she had her answer. The ball would be back in Harm's court. If he meant it, even just a little, he would let her know. After all, it had been several days since she had received the email and Harm was acting completely normal. He wasn't awkward around her at all. Maybe this was what he was waiting on.  
  
She clicked on her mouse to turn off her screen saver. She found that her mail window was still open under it. She hit reply and deleted out all but the important parts.  
  
Describe your dream wedding:  
Whatever Mac wants.  
  
Her reply was simple, yet meant a lot to her and held so many hopes for them.  
  
"Don't make promises you don't intend to keep."  
  
She held her breath and hit send. After the 'sending mail' window closed, she shut down the mail program and turned away from the computer screen. What was done was done. For better or worse, the ball was in his court right now. She looked up finally, and saw Harm standing in her door way.  
  
"Are you all right?" he asked. She had no idea how long he had been standing there, it kind of worried her. "You were looking awfully intense there for a bit."  
  
"I'm fine. What can I do for you today?"  
  
"Is Chloe still coming down in a few weeks?"  
  
"Yeah, she's skipping school Friday and her plane should land about three."  
  
"So, you're skipping out early too, that day?" He smiled at her and she couldn't help but smile back.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"While Chloe and I were out driving that night she mentioned to me how much she loved The Calling. They are playing in DC that Friday night, and I wondered if you guys would like to come with me to the show?"  
  
She looked at him again. Maybe this would work out.  
  
"Thanks, I'd have to ask Chloe's grandmother first."  
  
"I thought as much. Why don't you go ahead and try to call her. The tickets are only ten dollars so I need to get them ordered before they sell out."  
  
Mac picked her phone up and dialed the familiar number.  
  
"Martha, hello."  
  
(Mac, what can I do for you? Is everything all right dear?)  
  
"Yeah, it is. I have a question to ask you. When Chloe comes down is it okay if I take her to a concert?  
  
(What kind?)  
  
"It's one of her favorite bands, The Calling."  
  
(Oh, dear, she would be highly upset if I said no, wouldn't she?)  
  
"Probably. But if you don't feel comfortable I understand."  
  
(You'll be there, right?)  
  
"Yeah, me and my friend, Harm."  
  
(Chloe talks about him constantly, again. I guess she isn't mad at him anymore. Can you promise me that you'll keep her away from alcohol and drugs?)  
  
"If I have to tie her down, I swear." Mac tried to stifle the giggle she felt coming up. There was no way Chloe would get around any of that stuff with her around. It was a good thing Chloe told her at Christmas about the champagne at her wedding rehearsal. She would have killed Mic with her bare hands had she known that then.  
  
(Then I suppose it would be okay.)  
  
"Could you do me a favor and not mention this to her, I want it to be a surprise."  
  
(Of course, Mac I really need to run. I'll talk to you later when we know exactly when her plane gets in and what gate.)  
  
"Okay, thank you so much." She set the phone down and looked across her desk at Harm.  
  
"As long as we keep her away from drugs and alcohol."  
  
"I'd forgotten all about that stuff. I can't even remember the last time I went to a rock concert."  
  
"Neither can I. I think I was in boot camp."  
  
"I think I was in flight school. I remember getting very drunk and very..."  
  
"Harmon Rabb are you trying to tell me you inhaled?" She laughed at him for a moment. She would be genuinely shocked if the answer was yes.  
  
"Yes. Didn't you?"  
  
"No, the smell of marijuana makes me sick to my stomach."  
  
"It was a very long time ago and I only did it a few times. I had trouble remembering what I did the next morning. Very unpleasant feeling."  
  
"I know how you are about control. I'm having a very hard time imagining you high, Harm."  
  
"Thanks, I see how you treat me."  
  
Mac decided it would be best to steer away from this topic.  
  
"I can't believe you let her drive your car."  
  
"It was an empty parking lot. No cars in sight, and only one lonely security officer, who did pull us over."  
  
"What did you tell him?" She hadn't heard this part of the story.  
  
"That she was my daughter and I was teaching her how to drive. She didn't seem to have a problem with it."  
  
"Your brand new car, though?"   
  
"Mac, she already knew how to drive a stick. She didn't even grind the clutch."  
  
"That's my little sister."   
  
"Well, I need to get back to work and reserve those tickets."  
  
Mac watched his retreating back. He went into his office and turned to his computer, to buy the tickets, she assumed. She watched the bemused expression he got on his face as he was reading his mail, or at least she thought that was what he was doing. She watched him for a few minutes. Just as she was diverting her eyes, she caught him walking over to his printer across the room.  
  
******  
  
  
The next few weeks passed quickly for her. Harm was on a carrier on an investigation and she was using the 'out of sight, out of mind' philosophy with him. He wasn't around, so she concentrated on her work and not on what may or may not have been going on with them.  
  
The day before Chloe was to arrive, she received an email from Harm. He told her he didn't know if he would make it back before Friday, and that if he didn't for her to take Harriet to the concert. He told her where the tickets were.  
  
And that was all he said, nothing about the email from the previous week.  
  
She tried not to get her hopes up. Maybe he just didn't want what she did anymore. Or maybe, she should just wait and see what was going on.  
  
Friday morning, she was in the kitchen getting coffee when Harm walked in, still dressed in the khaki uniform he had been wearing on the Corral Sea.  
  
"Hey, you made it."  
  
"I wasn't sure if I would." He reached behind her and grabbed a cup for coffee. She tried not to react when he brushed up against her, closer than he needed to.  
  
"I'm picking Chloe up at 1500. Did you want to come with me?"  
  
"Actually, I haven't slept since sometime Wednesday. I'm going to report in to the Admiral, then I'm going to go home and crash for a bit. After you get Chloe, come by my place and we'll leave from there."  
  
"Sounds like a plan to me, sailor. I'll stop by my place so we can drop her stuff off."   
  
"Good." He turned then, and walked out of the room. Leaving her to wonder again what in the world was going on.  
  
*****  
  
It was almost five by the time they got to Harm's place. Mac pulled up behind his car.  
  
"Harm lives here?" Chloe asked, looking at the outside of the building. Mac laughed, remembering her own reaction to the place. Of course, back then the inside was just as bad, almost.  
  
"Looks can be deceiving, Chloe." They got out of the car and Mac locked her doors. "We'll be lucky if the elevator works so we might have to take the stairs." Mac could tell by the look on her face that she was still skeptical.  
  
Chloe looked around the apartment after Harm opened the door. "Whoa!"   
  
"Told you."   
  
Harm just shook his head. He couldn't count the number of times he got that reaction from people.  
  
"I hope Harriet isn't too upset that I came back in time."  
  
"I never told her. I figured I'd wait and see what you were doing."  
  
"Do you guys want to eat before or after?"  
  
"Before or after what?" Chloe asked. Mac still hadn't told her what they were doing that night.  
  
"It's a surprise," Harm and Mac answered together.  
  
"We stopped and got something on the way here, so I'd say after," Mac offered.  
  
  
*****  
  
Chloe had let out a scream that startled both Harm and Mac when he pulled up outside the venue.  
  
Before they got to the door, Chloe turned to Mac, "You are the best!"  
  
"It was Harm's idea."  
  
She threw herself into his arms. "I love you! If you're still single in seven years, will you marry me?"  
  
"I'll have to think about it."   
  
  
Now they were in the restaurant of Chloe's choice eating dinner. The waitress came up to their table to take their order. She noticed the shirt Chloe was holding up.  
  
"You're lucky, kid. When I was that age my parents would have never taken me to a concert." Chloe looked from Mac to Harm, expecting one of them to correct the wrong assumption. Harm just shrugged.  
  
"We're taking a different approach to child rearing, we figure that if we are with her, and do the stuff she likes, then we know where she is and that she's out of trouble."  
  
"I wish my father had that attitude," she answered before walking off with their order.  
  
Mac and Chloe laughed as she walked away.  
  
"You could have told her the truth," Chloe said.  
  
"Not the way she was looking at him. You and your groupies, one of these days I'm going to write them all down."  
  
"The ones that you know of at least." Chloe watched as Harm put his arm on the back of the seat he and Mac were sharing.  
  
"Can we go see Creed next time?"  
  
"I'd rather have my teeth pulled," Harm answered.  
  
*****  
  
Harm pulled up in front of his apartment and walked Mac and Chloe to the car.  
  
"I had fun tonight, Harm. Thank you so much." Chloe reached up and kissed him on the cheek before getting in the car.  
  
"Me too," Mac answered. She went to kiss him on the cheek also, but at the last minute changed her mind. Their lips met briefly in a chaste kiss. "I'll see you Monday."  
  
They drove away, leaving Harm to stand there wondering what in the world was going to happen next.  
  
  
He sat at his desk a few minutes later looking at a copy of the email Mac had sent back to him. Things really had not changed in their lives. He still didn't know what to do about the feelings he had for her that wouldn't go away. He couldn't get past the feeling that it was just too late for them. Their time had been before he left for flying and anything now would just blow up in their faces. He thought she felt the same way, he thought it was why she went ahead with her plans to marry Mic even after he had told her how he felt. In that backwards way he done it. Maybe the best thing to do was just to sit down and talk out their issues.  
  
With Chloe in town, he knew that his best bet was to wait until later.  
  
Across town, Mac and Chloe were curled up on her couch watching an old movie.  
  
"So tell me more about Brandon," Mac said during a commercial.  
  
"He's great. He's sweet and funny and really, really cute."  
  
Mac marveled once again at the way the fifteen year old mind worked. It was all okay as long as they were cute. "How old is he?"  
  
"He'll be sixteen this summer. His mom is buying him a car."  
  
"How serious is it?"   
  
"Not that serious, Mac. Don't pull a grandma on me here. It was so embarrassing listening to your grandmother talk about sex and birth control."  
  
"We're just looking out for you, sweetie."  
  
"What's up with you and Harm?"  
  
"I'm not sure. We're friends and neither one of us seems to want to push it further."  
  
"Doesn't want to or is afraid of what might happen."  
  
"Afraid, I guess. We've hurt each other so much in the past, I'm not sure anything between us would work."  
  
"You'll never know unless you try."  
  
**  
  
A few days later, Mac and Harm were assigned a case together. They were sitting in the conference room going over strategies.  
  
"Mac, look in my briefcase and get that file," Harm asked her from across the room. They had set both of them down by the door.  
  
Mac opened it and was shocked to find the email that she had sent him.  
  
"What's wrong?" He noted the lost expression on her face. When she didn't answer and didn't move for a few minutes, he got up and walked over to her. Standing behind her, he realized what she had.  
  
"I was beginning to think my reply had gotten lost in cyberspace."  
  
"No, I just don't know what to do about it."  
  
"Well, we could try our usual MO. Ignore it and hope it goes away." She tried to laugh, but it felt too bitter. This had stopped being funny a long time ago.  
  
"I'm tired of ignoring it, Mac. I'm just not sure it's the healthiest thing in the world for us."  
  
"Why?" She sat down in the nearest chair and motioned for him to sit beside her.  
  
"We've hurt each other so much in the past. I don't think we can get past it."  
  
"Harm, we can't go back and undue everything that's happened. We can move forward though."  
  
"Is that what you want?"  
  
"I've loved you for so long, I can't remember when I fell in love with you. Yes, I want to see if whatever is between us can work."  
  
"What if it doesn't? What if we wake up one morning and realize there is a reason why we never got together?"  
  
"What if we don't? What if we die in our sleep with ten kids and thirty grandkids?"  
  
They both laughed then. "You want to give birth to ten children?"  
  
"No, it's an analogy."  
  
"Mac, I love you. I just don't want to hurt you."  
  
"Anymore than you already have?" She noted the hurt look on his face.  
  
"I deserved that. What if we start out slow, and just see if what we think is there, is there?"  
  
"I can live with that." She leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the mouth. He deepened the kiss, pulling her toward him. The kiss went on for several minutes.  
  
They were so wrapped up in each other that they didn't notice the conference room door open. They didn't know someone else was there until they heard the clearing of a throat.  
  
"I hope this new relationship doesn't interfere with good order and discipline around here."  
  
They both jumped up and stood at attention.  
  
"No sir," they answered together.  
  
The Admiral just shook his head and walked away.  
  
"Well, that answers the question of how we're going to tell him," Harm quipped, before turning and pulling Mac back into his arms. 


End file.
